Posts Tagged ‘children’
Happy Father’s Day To The Good Dads/ Janice Levinson Protective Mothers’ Alliance International Executive Director/ Co-founder
What Makes A Good Dad????
I posed this question to our PMA International Protective Moms, Advocates, Administrators, Leaders, and Members. We came up with the following list:
Note: this list also applies to dads no longer in a relationship with the mother of their child/children
1. Any dad who supports the mother of his child/children emotionally, physically, and financially.
2. Dads who teach their child/children by words and actions to respect their mothers and women in general.
3. Any dad who sets an example for his child/ children that his family is always his priority.
4. Dads who stand firm as a role model for his child/ children of honesty, integrity, dependability, and kindness.
5. Dads who are available for their families emotionally and physically.
6. All dads who role model for their child/children positive work ethics.
7. All dads who discipline in a firm, yet fair and loving way.
8. Dads who are concerned for the safety of their child/children and their child/ children’s mother.
9. All dads who know how to disagree with respect and without violence or abuse of any kind.
10. Any dad who teaches his child/children that it is ok to make mistakes and points out his mistakes as an example.
11. All dads who embrace the washing machine and diaper changing.
12. Any dad who knows how to find the kitchen.
13. All dads who comprehend, appreciate and respect the challenges women and mothers face in our world today.
14. Any dad who knows how to tolerate and even pretend to enjoy a trip to the mall, theme park, children’s’ concert etc. with his family.
15. Dads who can demonstrate that family time is more important than his favorite sports event.
16. Any dad who can be a good listener and a strong consistent shoulder
17. All dads who are not afraid to get silly.
18. Dads who embrace water fights, pillow fights and up -all- night sleepovers.
19. Any dad not afraid to sing, dance, and play on the floor with his child/children
20. Dads who play dress up and have tea parties
Add to our list in the comment section. We would love to hear your thoughts.
We at PMA International honor “The Good Dad” on this Father’s Day.
“The most important thing a father can do for his children is to love their mother.” ~ David O. McKay
PMA International Face book event.
https://www.facebook.com/events/564917703567350/permalink/1027045967354519/
BRING OUR CHILDREN HOME!
PMA International Healing and Prayer Network’s Face book event.
Topic; Bring our Children Home! Please join PMA International’s Healing and Prayer Network for this world wide candle lighting event. Join us with candles , positive focused energy and prayers for children suffering from DV by proxy and family court abuse/corruption. All beliefs are welcome. This is an all inclusive event for all protective mothers and their supporters. We value your participation.
Woman finds 100-year-old letters in ceiling/ TheDailyShare
http://www.hlntv.com/…/woman-finds-mysterious-love-letters-…
Beautiful story highlighting the importance of writing love letters. The power of love, transcends time, and space and will always find a way into the hearts of those we love.
Join our Love Letters To Our Children Campaign on FB and follow us on WordPress. We value your participation.
https://www.facebook.com/events/597929206912196/
https://loveletterstoourchildren.wordpress.com
The Well-Versed Child of a Narcissist/ Surviving Narcissism – by Jesse Blayne
The article below was originally posted on Surviving Narcissism and was written by Jesse Blayne ( link below)
http://survivingnarcissism.com/2015/08/19/the-well-versed-child-of-a-narcissist/
The well-versed child of a narcissist knows never to get his hopes up. He grows up believing that it’s better never to count on people.
If he trusts at all, he’ll only trust a handful of folks. Often he’ll choose to trust only a few close friends instead of relations.
The well-versed child of a narcissist develops a wicked sense of humor. She’s been laughing at dysfunction since she was old enough to understand it.
She’s able to see what makes people tick. She knows who to stay away from, and who to develop relationships with, believing that her energy ought to be saved for a select group. She won’t have a lot of friends. She doesn’t want to risk being vulnerable. But for those in her inner circle, she’ll give her whole heart.
The well-versed child of a narcissist learns at an early age that his preferences don’t matter. He’ll grow up making excuses for liking certain things. He’ll often apologize for taking up space, or taking too long to tie his shoes, or say he’s sorry for wanting a different book. It’ll take a special person to convince him that he matters, that his preferences are as important as the next guy’s, and that he’s entitled to take up as much space in this world as anyone else. Until that person comes along, he’ll feel like an inconvenience.
The well-versed child of a narcissist sees through image. She isn’t impressed by status. She wouldn’t walk across the street to meet a pop star. She grew up surrounded by smoke and mirrors. Only authenticity speaks to her. She is not at all interested in the games people play.
The well-versed child of a narcissist can walk through a crowd and immediately identify the martyrs, the drama queens, the victims and the narcissists. He grew up with the dark side of the human psyche. Nothing surprises him anymore. If he’s lucky, he won’t always expect the worst out of folks. If she’s wary, she’ll pass up many relationships, believing she has to dig deep before she finds the good in a person.
If the well-versed child of a narcissist calls you his friend, you are unique. You’ve passed his tests. You’ve proven you can be trusted. You’ve shown that you are genuine. You are true to your word and your sense of humor can keep up with his. If you are the trusted friend of a child of a narcissist, you’ve been given a rare opportunity to witness courage, strength and resiliency.
Anxiety in Children: Don’t Look the Other Way / Huff Post Parents
“I have tried to dismiss the anxious behavior by telling myself that my children have not experienced the trauma that I experienced. They have not been physically, sexually or emotionally abused like I was. They have had a great childhood compared to my experiences” ~Elisabeth Corey
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/elisabeth-corey/anxiety-in-children-dont-_b_8027388.html
Excellent Hollywood Dramatization of DV by Proxy ( Alienation )
Joe R. Barrow has created one of the best dramatizations explaining Parental Alienation Syndrome, this adapted from a Hollywood production. START VIEWING AT BEGINNING
https://leslinetmd.wordpress.com/2015/08/07/portrait-of-a-monster-parental-alienation-syndrome/
Disclaimer:
As PMA International has posted before, we prefer the term DV by Proxy to explain the manipulations an abuser parent uses to teach the child to reject the protective parent. We prefer this term because;
1. In our opinion ,it more accurately depicts the actions taken by the abuser parent towards the child
2 There has been a lot of misinformation about parental alienation circulating the internet and beyond.
3.The term parental alienation and /or parental alienation syndrome has been use as a legal defense for abusive dads in family court. Most often this term has been used by the attorneys of dads who sexual abuse their children. This legal defense is used – most often- by attorneys in family court , for the purpose of deflecting blame from the criminal actions of their client onto the protective mother.
4 The result of the above has frequently been, abusers winning custody due to this misuse of the term.
Because the term is so emotionally charged for protective mothers, and for all the reasons above, we feel DV by Proxy is a better choice. Please keep in mind others still use the term Parental Alienation. Since PMA International did not author this piece, the term parental alienation or alienation may be used.
After her dad publicly shames her in YouTube video, 13-year-old Washington girl jumps off overpass
Izabel Laxamana, a 13-year-old girl in Tacoma, Washington died by suicide after jumping off a highway overpass on Friday, May 29. Days before, Laxamana’s father Jeff had reportedly punished her for an unspecified transgression by cutting off her hair and uploading a video to YouTube. There’s now a controversy brewing online and among the girl’s friends and family over whether the video caused her death.
Tacoma’s News Tribune reports that the girl, who they don’t identify by name, exited a car and jumped off a bridge onto Interstate 5. She was taken to a Seattle hospital, where she died on Saturday. Friends of the Laxamana family are now raising money for funeral costs on a GoFundMe site.
Her father deleted the original :15 second video from YouTube, but not before a friend of Izabel’s recorded it and reposted it:
While people are questioning whether her suicide was the result of being publicly shamed, it is clear from accounts of friends and family that Izabel suffered from depression and anxiety. In August 2014 when she posted to her Google+ account:
I feel hated most of the time im in school i feel looked down on and i get judged alot…. But what keeps me going is people like kian who have gone through the same thing as me… In a school with so many people its weird to say “i feel alone” but the truth is that you really do feel alone. So thanks for everything kian….
Nonetheless, friends posted the video as a warning for parents about the consequences of public shaming videos. And the debate rages on about whether these types of videos are a form of abuse. Either way, a beautiful young girl has lost her life and her friends and family are left to pick up the pieces.
Love Letters To Our Children – Leave A Legacy Of Love For Your Child
Love Letters To Our Children; Leave A Legacy Of Love For Your Child
To all Hero Protective Mothers and their supporters; PMA International invites you to follow our new Word Press Blog. This is the new home of our” Love Letters To Our Children Campaign.” Thank you in advance for your support and participation. PMA International loves and supports you and your precious children..always. Protective Hero Moms: “Leave a Legacy Of Love For Your Child”
Happy Mother’s Day To All Protective Mother Heroes
This is for all the Protective Mothers with empty arms and hurting hearts who are missing their children every second of every day, but who are deeply hurting this weekend- Mother’s Day weekend. Know that no matter what, you ARE your children’s mother. No one -and certainly no court- can take away this God-given role in your children’s lives. Please know this in your heart. PMA INTL. celebrates you, Protective Mom, and deeply understands the unconditional love and heroic sacrifices you have made to protect your children from abuse and harm. You are modern day heroes, and PMA INTL strongly believes that you will go down in history as such. PMA INTL loves and supports you and your precious children now and forever. You are always in are hearts. Happy Mother’s Day!
The mothers jailed after waving to their children in the street / The Telegraph
By Christopher Booker
It’s a mystery why judges and social workers think they have the legal authority to act in such an inhuman way
Many will have been amazed by the story of Kathleen Danby, the 72-year-old grandmother given a three-month prison sentence after police produced CCTV footage showing her and her 18-year-old granddaughter running to embrace in a pub car park. The granny, who lives in Orkney, had travelled down to Derby to meet her beloved young relation in defiance of a 2007 court order, which has allowed them only to have “supervised contact” by telephone once a month.
The girl, said to have a mental age of nine, is so unhappy in “care” that, according to Mrs Danby, she has run away 175 times. She was forbidden to see her father after he was jailed for roughly restraining her from “running into a busy road when she was having a temper tantrum”. He has twice since been in prison, once for waving at his daughter when he saw her in a passing taxi on her way to school.
Martin Cardinal, the Court of Protection judge who sentenced Mrs Danby, said: “I am sure this grandmother needs restraint.” It was Judge Cardinal who made news last year when it was revealed that he had secretly jailed Wanda Maddocks – for removing her 80-year-old father from a care home where he had been placed by social workers, and where he was being so ill-treated that she feared for his life.
Of all the disturbing features of our “care” system, one of the most chilling is the draconian restrictions it imposes on contact between children and loving parents or grandparents who have not harmed them in any way. If they are allowed to meet at all, it is usually in a grim council “contact centre”, where every word is noted by a “contact supervisor”, watching for any breach of the rules, which can stop the “contact” dead.
I have seen several of the contracts that family members must sign before being allowed these contact sessions. One is 23 clauses long. These severely limit or forbid any show of affection by either side. Conversation must be limited only to “everyday matters”, such as how the children are doing at school.
Virtually nothing the bewildered children want to discuss is allowed. Totally prohibited is any reference to why they are in “care”, what is to happen to them, or how they are being treated (in one case, where a distressed 11-year-old girl told her parents that she was being sexually abused by a member of the foster carer’s family, her parents never saw her again).
No reference can be made to the courts, social workers or any other “professional” involved in the case. Particularly forbidden is any “whispering”. Where foreign children are in care, they and their parents are forbidden to use the language they speak at home. When a Lithuanian grandfather recently flew to London to see his grandson, he was merely allowed one five-minute video exchange on Skype, using the only three words of English he knew: “I love you”.
Where no contact is allowed at all, the punishments for breaches can be astonishingly severe. I know of half a dozen cases where mothers were jailed simply for waving at their children when seeing them by chance in the street.
I recently reported on a mother, still in prison, after her desperately unhappy 13-year-old daughter had run away from a care home where she was being physically ill-treated. The mother had rung the police, but was careful to have no direct contact with her daughter, until the police begged her to go and calm the girl down in her brother’s house, where she was screaming and sobbing. For this, the social workers persuaded a judge to jail her for six months.
The real mystery is why the courts and social workers think they have the legal authority to act in this utterly inhuman way. If any lawyer can tell me precisely which law allows them thus to trample on one of the deepest and most natural of human instincts, I would be very grateful.
Protective Mothers' Alliance International 